Redskins Name Change

Every year, the PC police visit Washington and try to tell us to change the name of our football team. Every year, we tell them to go away. I’ve always been a charter member of the unwelcoming committee when they arrive. Our team is the Redskins, it simply isn’t that offensive, and the rest of you Cowboys fans masquerading as sensitivity trainers need to leave our town.

At least that’s been my attitude up til now. After the first two weeks of the season, I have a new view. No, don’t worry, the uber-sensitivity police didn’t get to me. I’m just being practical. This current group of nincompoops wearing the burgundy and gold is not worthy of the great name Redskins. The Redskins are winners. The Redskins have three super bowl rings, all earned when I had a full head of hair, to prove it. So, we may not have the same reasons for doing it, but I’m now in full agreement with the PC folks. It’s time to change the name.

After considerable thought, I propose we change the name to The Washington Liberals. There’s nothing more descriptive of Washington as a city and I could look forward to opening the paper every Monday morning to see above-the-fold headlines like these:

Liberals Lose Again

Liberals Mauled by Bears

Lions Shred Liberals in Detroit

Liberals Buffaloed by the Bills

Rams Batter the Liberals

Saints Run the Liberals Out of Washington

Liberals Pack Up and Leave Washington after Green Bay Defeat

If we ever figure out how to win football games again, we can always change the name back to Redskins.

The name change will require a new helmet!


About Bruce Robertson

Bruce Robertson is an amateur writer and professional provocateur
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